Anniversary..

It's been a year folks.  I have been single with you guys for 365 days (pretty long relationship by my standards).  That makes almost 6 years of singality on the calendar.  I'm no closer to finding a man than when I started writing this blog.  Yes, my friends, I am still failing. 

Don't get me wrong, I've had some close calls.  I did some things in the past year that I didn't think that I would ever do.  I've made some progress, but for every step forward, I've taken a different one back.  Why the hell is this still a learning process for me?  Am I retarded? 

Last year, I brought you two very important blogs.  "Cuffin' 101" and "The Starting Five."  If you didn't read those two blogs, go back and get hip right now.  Go ahead, I'll wait. 

The Five is no more.  They dropped off one by one, and every time I tried to replace one of the bastards, the replacements started fucking up too.  I, literally, had the worst second string as a whole in dating history.  Them dudes couldn't find the hole in my vagina without step by step directions. 

I have no Starting anything anymore.  I don't think that I could get that bored with life again. 

Pause:  I say that now, but those who know me best, know that I could get that bored tomorrow.

Cuffing Season is now open.  I decided that I was actually gonna do that again this year--the right way.  Ya know, cuff one, let the others go unlike last year where my greedy ass tried to keep them all. 

So I had reduced it down to 3, and I won't lie to you all.  I was going to base this decision almost solely on sexual performance.  Then I realized that's how I got myself in the mess that I was in last season so I cut them off as well.

Pause:  At the end of Cuffing Season last year, I found myself telling one of the numbers that I loved him.  Don't remember who, go back and read dammit!  Clearly, I went about cuffing season in the wrong way, and clearly, add that one to the failure list. 

Cuffing Season, as a rule, has the potential to become a relationship if you treat the season as a trial run and not a way to pass the time.  Last year, I was just trying to pass the time.  This year, I might try something different.  BIG ANNOUNCEMENT COMING!! Wait for it.....wait for it........
I'm going to try to find myself a relationship.  I mean, I always have been, but this time I'm going to make the search real.  Put these dudes to the test. 

I don't really know if I'm ready for all of this.  Relationships are hard, they take a lot of work and effort.  I honestly don't know if I have it in me.  What I do know for sure after having a very meaningful relationship is that meaningful relationships are awesome.  I have spent so much time being single that I forgot how emotionally satiating they are.  In my own little cocoon, I was very happy.

Now I just have to pay more attention to the world around me. 

Advice:  (to myself)  Don't get so caught up in the new car smell that you forget how to drive the car. 
Don't get dick-matized (dick comes a dime a dozen and I have 2 dollars).  Don't fall for someone unwilling to catch you.  Don't take the blue pill, see everything for what it is.

Let's see if I can take my own damn advice. 

We'll play with some more numbers next time around.

Comments

  1. Community Action HeroSeptember 16, 2013 at 10:51 PM

    I stopped, dropped and read. Took the time to read as your story is rich, ruby red and real. (+ resonating with my own adventure, my dream not yet realized)

    Thank You for your Story as I am reminded of getting from here from there.

    We shared a brief and lively chat at a Nikkis' Nite. I hope we do again....your newest blog fan!

    ReplyDelete

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